Dear Dad...

It appears one has flown over the cuckoo's nest.  And when I say ONE, I mean ME.  It has been almost 5 years to the date since you've been gone and when I say GONE, I mean gone as in dead, deceased, passed on, crossed over... but you were long gone before that.  We know that you had mental illness, too.  You were highly OCD.   Remember how you would make us late all the time because you had to check and re-check to make sure we (all us girls) had turned off our hairdryers, curling irons, etc?  As if we could just leave a hairdryer running and not know it...

Your issues were passed along to your favourite middle daughter, ME!  SURPRISE!   Although, you never really called me your favorite middle daughter.  You usually just said I wasn't as dumb as I looked.  Maybe that's because my hairdryer was never actually running on its own when you went back the third or fourth time to make sure.  I know it was the '80s and all, and yes, we did overuse hairspray, curling irons and hairdryers, but seriously, Dad.  I didn't look THAT dumb, did I? 

I just wanted you to know, even though you probably can't read this and even if you could, you would only be wondering why I haven't already dated this instead of wanting to know what I wanted you to know... gawd,  you were pretty OCD about that too.  Everything HAD to have a date and time.  No wonder I can remember days and dates and times and good grief, it's a curse. There are some things I just want to forget and can't.  Thanks for that.  In any case, to make you feel better, Dad... the date is automatically entered when I post this blog.  Do you even know what a blog is?  Probably not.  When I would tell you years ago that I was burning a CD, you'd say "Why do you want to burn your CDs?  Don't you like them?"

Anyway, before I have to hit the big anniversary date of your DEATH and be my dramatic self, I just wanted you to know (trying this again) I'd write this now and say,

Dear Dad,
I miss you something terrible.  If I can make it until May 10th, I will look up (or down...) and say thanks.  You got me here and probably because you did pass along your OCD and other unnamed mental illnesses.  And see... I really wasn't as dumb as I looked... perhaps.
Love, 
Your favourite middle daughter

 This is a lovely photo of "Dad" and me from October 1984.  Yes, it was dated on the back, but I knew that anyway.  This was at Disney World.  He was probably wondering if I had turned off my curling iron.  Can't imagine why because it didn't do my hair much good (obviously).  And why am I holding his hat?  And why is he sitting like that?  Also, I cut out my younger sister who was sitting on the other side of him.  She was 9 then and wearing a Mickey Mouse hat.  I thought I'd be kind (for once).   The '80s were so cruel.

(R.M.B.)

~mar 1936 - sept 2008~